Dealing With Doubt

The biggest obstacle between you and your BIG dream is self doubt.  Remember: you are not alone though.  It is what we do with this sneaky demon that determines whether we move on to success or recede backwards into our den.

One of the big differences between successful people and the masses isn’t what they know, who they know, or how talented they are.  It is often how willing (or unwilling) they are to let doubt sabotage their plans.  What do you do when other people scoff at your dream?  Or even more important, how much time on the microphone of your inner theater do you allow your own doubting voice to have?

Lupita Nyong’o, Oscar winner for her role as Patsey in 12 Years as a Slave, gave this great example to the women at Texas Women’s Conference last month of fighting her demons as she launched from drama school at Yale in a major motion picture–with no actual experience.  I love her story, especially because it speaks to each of us when we get big ideas in an area we are not the “expert” — yet. Here is an excerpt from the Texas Women’s Conference website:

As an example, she points to her experience of being cast in 12 Years a Slave when she was still at the Yale School of Drama: “I was panicking a lot about it, certain that I would fail miserably at the role because I had no experience working on such a big film with such big people. It was bound to be the biggest challenge of my life.” She expressed her fears to her counselor, who had her imagine the worst that could happen—“I imagined forgetting my lines, being the weak link of the cast, getting fired and replaced, being blacklisted in Hollywood even before I could be on a list,” recalls Nyong’o, who says that she then “basically cried a river of all the woes that lay ahead of me” before her advisor asked, “And then what happens next?”

“I paused and gave it some serious thought,” Nyong’o says. “And then I burst out laughing and said, ‘I guess life goes on.’” The exercise taught Nyong’o the importance of good mental habits. “I felt such a relief in that moment and free enough from the demon that was my self-doubt, that I could actually go away and do the work that I needed to do to prepare for the role,” she says.

I am going to hold on to that story whenever I start doubting my certification, training, or experience at something I want to do.  She tackled her doubt and won an Oscar!  What a loss if she had let the doubt win.  What are you letting doubt keep you from doing?  What will the rest of us miss out on if you continue to hold back?

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