Tag Archives: meditation

Wise Women Often Speak in Whispers

Two questions I get asked most often are, “How do I get in touch with my inner guidance?” and “How do I tell the difference between my inner guide and my anxieties and doubts?”

 These are important questions. Each of us has our own compass to know what is true for us. Unfortunately most people rarely look inside for answers to their most pressing questions. There are some universal truths to help you hear more clearly your wise inner soul and discern her from the other inner voices.

 Of course, the first and foremost step to cultivating your inner wisdom is beginning to listen.

Most of us are so busy “doing life” that we rarely slow down long enough to hear the small, quiet whisper of our inner guide. I have learned to notice that when I finally have time with nothing planned if I am quick to call a friend, or make a date, I am probably avoiding hearing what she has to say.

An easy way to make sure you’ve opened the door and invited your wise woman to speak is to cultivate quiet time in your life–time when you are not trying to figure something out, get anything done, or interact with someone else–just time for you. This can take many forms, and some of my favorite ways are to:

  • Journal
  • Meditate
  • Exercise
  • Unplug my phone and computer for an afternoon
  • Walk in the woods
  • Take a long bath
  • Practice yoga

What you do to cultivate your inner guide is not as important as that you do it, and do it regularly enough that a deep conversation can emerge.

The reason most of us feel so disconnected to our inner wise woman is because she speaks softly, almost in whispers. She does not push or pull at us like doubt and anxiety; nor does she turn up the volume to get our attention. She waits patiently until we turn our attention inward.

 In today’s tech culture with our fast paced lives where we multitask everything, it takes an active decision to cultivate wisdom. Usually we turn outside for advice–friends, co-workers, books, and authority figures. We ask for more information.

 Yet, wisdom is an inner knowing rather than factual intelligence. I have been meditating for 25 years and although I don’t hear loud voices talking to me; my regular practice of going inside keeps me calm under pressure and helps me feel the difference between my myriad of negative stories and my true inner guide.

 When your inner wise woman gives you advice it usually causes a release in the tension in your shoulders, your jaw, or might even bring out a sigh of relief. She does not shame or make you feel guilty. She helps you move towards more joy. Her wisdom can open doors that you did not even know were there; once you begin to listen.

 In some traditions, when you meditate you incline your head slightly towards your heart as if preparing to listen. I like that visual. My mind is a great tool and when it is in service to my heart my life works well, people appear in time to help just when I need them, and circumstances arise that I could not force into existence–all as if by magic.

 Make time each day to quiet your mind and soon your heart will be guiding you regularly.

 

Three Steps to Greater Happiness

Recently, I heard a brain specialist talk about they have learned how readily our brains can morph and learn new things–even long into adulthood!  That is good news, because years ago they thought once we passed a golden age we no longer could create new neuro-pathways or widen our pathways to carry more information. But today, brain plasticity is considered proven by science.

So how does this relate to your happiness? Well, if you are like many people your life has a certain rhythm to it. Things happen the same way today that they did yesterday.  You eat the same things this month that you ate last month and spend time with the same people. There may be nothing wrong with all this; but there is also not much stimulating about it either.

They are called habits; we all have them and we actually are controlled by them.

What if I told you that by changing some of your habits you would actually be increasing the plasticity of your brain AND would become happier? It’s true!

Here are three steps that help with brain plasticity that you can do anywhere, anytime; so start today!

  1. Select on thing you do every day and change it.

    Don’t start with the most ingrained habit that will be hard to change like smoking, coffee, or such. If you always wake up at 7am, start waking up at 6:45 and find something pleasurable to do with the extra 15 minutes BEFORE you start you regular morning routine.

  2. Focus on one thing at a time for at least 30 minutes each day and increase the amount of time as you can.

    This can be meditation, but it can also be that you are committing 30 minutes each day to a specific project when you turn off your phone, close your door, tell others you are unavailble and resist the urge to check your emails or social media as a distraction. Training your brain to focus is like exercising; it starts hard and often you don’t initially see results and can become discouraged. But, just like physical exercise your mental exercise will pay off in big ways. You will not only get the accomplishment of finishing more things as you learn to focus, but you will also find your ability to solve problems and think will expand, too.

  3. Expose yourself to new experiences.

    This will take some effort and planning in order to be doing new things regularly.  This is why adventurous vacations make us feel more alive; while staying at the same old hotel chain in a new city feels dry. What things have you wanted to do and never have? Take that photography class. Go to the MeetUp group. You don’t have to do things you would not enjoy to go outside your comfort zone; you have probably a plethora of things you have never done that you wish you had!