When things happen, like a commercial plane being shot down over the Ukraine killing hundreds of innocent people, it is easy to tell ourselves the world is a mess. It is somehow comforting to talk to others about how horrible the world is. Our media reminds us daily about how frightened we should be–even when things as shocking as what happened this week over the Ukraine, on the ground in Israel/Palestine, and elsewhere are not in the headlines.
We feel compassion, perhaps disheartened, or fearful when we learn of such things because when one of us suffers, at some level we all suffer. We all feel helpless at easing the obvious suffering of those experiencing these events first hand.
Yet, these headlines are the exceptions despite the fact they are the rule in the media. Ruthlessness, calculated harm and revenge are not the norm. The natural state of human beings is joy and kindness. We learn hatred and revenge. Look into the eyes of a young child or baby. You will never find revenge, hatred, or scorn. You might see fright, or sadness, or brief anger. But even these pass quickly and the inner experience returns to joy, kindness, and curiosity.
Over time we learn to cover up those pieces of ourselves — to protect us from being hurt, or shamed, or in any way vulnerable to an uncertain and often unfair world. Yet, at your core you are full of joy, kindness and curiosity. And the odd thing is — so are the people who do these heinous acts that hurt so many others, whether in war ridden patches around the world–or in our own homes.
We cannot protect ourselves from everything “bad.” Yet, we can create our life from the inner part of ourselves that radiates joy, kindness and curiosity — even if only dimly at the moment. We can feed our minds and our hearts the things that encourage and grow our joy, kindness, and curiosity. What we read and watch and listen to really is food for our emotions. We can insist that the people, places , events and circumstances we choose for our lives encourage and grow our joy, kindness, and curiosity. And when they do not — we can remember although we cannot control everything in our world to be perfect, we can move away from situations that repeatedly do not bring out our joy, kindness and curiosity.
Sometimes moving away is not a physical move, but an internal shift. Many Holocaust quotes speak of brave hearts recognizing that the Nazi’s could not determine how they felt and thought. Their inner world was still in their control. This amazing inner control is what saved some from succumbing to the insanity of that moment.
As we grow joy, kindness and curiosity in ourselves, we begin to turn on the light in our world. And when a light goes on — the darkness is no more. Every moment of joy in each of us is another candle of light, adding light to our world.
Let’s use these sad and painful events as a wake up call. Let’s re-member our inner light. Tonight before you go to bed, or tomorrow when you wake, I invite you to turn off the news, change your focus from the dark or fearful images in your mind or world, and create more light. Ask yourself these three questions:
1. What can I do today (tomorrow) to grow joy, kindness, or curiosity in myself?
2. What can I NOT do that diminishes my joy, kindness or curiosity?
3. What five small acts can I do that add joy, kindness or curiosity to my world and those in it?
And then, set out to do them. Join me on a 40 day journey, to see what changes we can inspire in ourselves and our world. Let me know what you learn.
